death doula
- Sierra Sol
- Dec 28, 2019
- 1 min read
my voice trembled
as I whispered to you,
“it’s okay.
you can let go now.
we’re here.
we love you.”
my mind was quiet,
filled with an indescribable clarity
of what to do.
my spirit relayed to me
that I was about to go through
the biggest initiation of my life,
and to hold absolutely nothing back.
I was afraid to love you.
I was afraid I was too much like you.
I was afraid to show myself to you.
but in those last moments,
none of that mattered.
I knew in my bones
I was going to be with you,
no matter what,
as you crossed back
to your home
among the stars.
as the passageway began to open,
I felt the last remnants
of your human consciousness
fight for breath,
fight for a heartbeat.
I felt you,
lost somewhere between
gripping onto life
and letting go
into the ultimate surrender.
in this moment
I was struck with a passion
unlike anything I’ve ever felt
to make for damn sure
you knew
you’re not alone,
and that you are allowed to let go,
peacefully.
one hand in yours,
one hand rubbing your head
the way you did for me
when I couldn’t sleep.
with each stroke of my hand,
I felt the love in my heart and yours
burn away
all the fear you’ve felt
your entire life,
and I felt your struggle subside,
until you breathed your last breath.
and what a surreal,
incomprehensible
moment it was.
my soul then told me,
the angels will take it from here.
and I surrendered
back into the tears of my raw humanness,
and into the beginning
of the rest of my life.
but first,
as you were escorted into the Universe,
I heard you say,
check the song!
and sure enough,
through the medium you loved most,
you communicated to us
with absolute perfection
through a Beatles song,
telling us,
“you say goodbye,
and I say Hello.”
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